Breastfeeding is a journey, an exhausting one with some spilled milk and quite a bit of tears. It is a journey for mothers whose high needs baby needs to nurse constantly. It is also a journey for mothers w hose babies just can’t or refuse to latch, so that exclusive pumping becomes an unavoidable option.
I didn’t intend to belabour the topic, but my fingers ran away with me over a few sessions writing this. I haven’t finished but I can see this turning out to be a long article that likely will only be of interest to a very, very small group of people. But oh well. Moving on…
Object lesson #1 Have a clear, executable idea of how to breastfeed and what to do if baby fails to latch, don’t assume it just happens
I love the intimacy of the experience when the baby latches and then falls sleep, a tiny, warm bundle in your arms. But the tedious pumping part of the journey I abhorred. And so I had always planned to just exclusively latch if I could, and do without the pumping.
But it was not to be.
An emergency C-section (read about it here) , excessive bleeding on my part and not breathing for a while on the baby’s part meant he didn’t even start that journey within an hour of birth (as nature intended it to be) but only from the 2nd afternoon.
We were given a hands-on practical and painful lesson on breastfeeding. And then we were left alone with the baby in the room for the night. Just that one lesson didn’t immediately made us and the baby experts. The baby howled through the night between bouts of sleep. The lactation consultant was not available at night so I caved in and we gave the baby infant formula.
The experience did make me bitter about the hospital on hindsight. We support breastfeeding, said the hospital, therefore the baby needs to room in with you. But apparently the hospital’s support ended with that one lesson because no matter how often we requested to see the lactation consultant, she did not come and so the new parents that we are were left to our own devices.
In the dark of the night.
So very overwhelmed.
TIP Consider having your confinement lady room overnight with you to help if it makes sense. Instead of your partner, who may be tired out from running around settling the admin, the relatives, etc already.
Also consider getting an external lactation consultant in ASAP if you need help and the hospital is unable to give you a precise time/appointment with regard to when their lactation consultant is available.
Make sure to pack your pump with you, in case baby doesn’t latch well and you need to pump it out for relief or just to start building your milk supply.
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Object lesson #2 Even if you are in a lot of pain and can’t move to save your life, don’t wait to get help to start pumping
I was in a lot of pain from the c-section. It was around the second week that I finally felt human again and arranged for a lactation consultant to come for a visit. By then I felt very engorged and desperately need help. But again it was too late, the lactation consultant’s visit was helpful but over the weekend I was feverish and was diagnosed with mastitis.
It was week 3 or week 4 when my gynae appointment finally came along. By then the mastitis had developed into several abscesses, and I had to be referred to a breast surgeon.
Of course I was worried. I had just gone under the knife once and I was not keen to go under the knife again.
I guess it was serious but not serious enough to require immediate surgical procedures. The breast surgeon got the lactation consultant to work with me and try and see if we could massage out the abscess.
It took 4-5 long weeks of pumping 7-8 times a day, lots of antibiotics, lecithin, cabbage, sweat and tears. But that got me in the “groove” of exclusively pumping afterwards so that baby still get some benefits of breastmilk. So I was highly reluctant to stop because I had already put in that 4-5 weeks of effort to remove the abscess and grow the small milk supply that I have.
TIP I wish I had known about the LaVie Warming Massage Pads then! Warm towel compress just didn’t work for me. The pair of LaVie warming massage pads I bought after I recovered has become something I can’t do without since I got it.
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Without that ordeal, it would be highly debatable if I was inclined to routinely pump 7-8 times a day at all. It was just something I was never prepared to do.
Object lesson #3 Getting baby back to the breast… lots of luck needed where getting the right help at the right time is concerned it seems
And so I still tried to get baby who preferred the bottle back to the breast. I had a friend who motivated me. I saw lactation consultants for follow ups. And the breastfeeding support hotline was very, very helpful. I regretted that I did not use that helpline sooner.
TIP Start your breastfeeding journey early! Join the Breastfeeding Mothers’ Support Group! A very supportive community with good information.
I think I had a very clear goal of breastfeeding for two years so baby can reap the benefits of breast milk fully, if I could get baby back to the breast. Otherwise I would pump whatever is available up to six months since by the time I fully recovered I was already close to month three. So that was the time frame I gave myself and baby to get back to the breast.
Object lesson #4 Having a supportive friend to talk to helps a lot for you to stay positive
There were far more downs than ups, and so it wasn’t easy to stay positive. Even now, I struggle to recall the precious moments when baby latched. And when baby started to get distracted and to reject even his formula bottle at around 5 months old. I decided to be realistic and throw in the towel. After all, I needed to start thinking about transitioning the baby to solids rather than fixate on something that has the most benefits within the first 6 months to a year. It’s time this breastfeeding journey come to an end.
TIP Speaking of ups and downs, it’s often said that expressing breast milk shouldn’t hurt. But perhaps moms who pumped exclusively or are new to pumping would at some time or other hurt themselves for various reasons. Pumping 7 or 8 or even 10 times a day is no joke! Here are three other essential products that I can’t do without in my breastfeeding journey.
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Buy on Amazon | How to use the Haakaa
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That said, even though I intended only to pump for 6 months if baby didn’t latch. I only started to wind down on the pumping at the end of the 6 months. And just like the emotional roller coaster ride this journey has been for the first six months, the next 3 months that I spent gradually dropping on average one pump a week was no less hormonal.
And now I have come to the final milestone of this breastfeeding journey
I am writing this post in the final week of may so-called breastfeeding journey at 9 months after delivery. I suppose you can call it an exorcism, get it off the chest once and for all.
Packing up that part of my life is taking some time. For example, what do I do with the 110 pieces of unused milk bags or all the plastic pumping accessories that can still possibly be reused before being recycled. I was surprised, but when I listed used flanges at a nominal fee for sizing purposes only, people bought them! Flanges for sale here. You can also buy my unused milk bags here. :P
But it’s really time-consuming to coordinate collection with multiple parties for all these loose pieces. So for things like used milk storage bottles that can’t even be traded in, I’m just going to recycle them directly.
If you are reading this, what are your essential items in your breastfeeding journey?
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Kismet
I wish I were pregnant. No male parrots here but I still lay infertile eggs.
weliveinaflat
How often do you lay eggs?
Kismet
3,4, or 5 once every spring.