Headline News: Dog stages unlicensed protest action at home, owner says dog is being stupid

Singapore – Are protests becoming the trend in Singapore, as this tiny island continues to grow its population so that any protest held can actually have the potential of visually becoming a true mass spectacle? Hot on the heels of bloggers staging protest against the government’s website licensing rules, a local rescued mongrel dog has just staged the country’s first unlicensed mongrel dog protest in her very own home.

Her cause? The right to sleep with her head on the floor… or maybe she was lobbying for a pillow… who can know what goes on in a dog’s mind?

Her owners, Mr & Mrs P, are adamant that the protest is not a result of dog abuse.

“We just upgraded her bed over the weekend,” Mrs P said in an exclusive interview with herself on her blog – weliveinaflat.wordpress.com, “Her bed is now 120 x 60 cm, so much more space to spread out compared to when it was just 65 x 65 cm! She is not like all these other 17 dogs that need bigger beds.”

Picture: Donna the local mongrel on the 65 x 65 cm cushion that her owners claim is a dog bed.

Picture: Donna the local mongrel on her new 120 x 60 cm baby cot mattress that her owners claim is a dog bed.

Mrs P had written on her blog in a previous article that the old bed was too small for the dog and the dog was often observed sleeping on the bed with the head hanging off it on the floor. The couple decided it was time to change the bed when the dog ate something bad and vomited over the bed.

When questioned if the dog may be protesting against not having a dedicated dog bed and instead having to put up with human furniture masquerading as dog beds, the couple explained that the dog preferred human furniture especially the forbidden firm foam sofa in the living room.

“Dedicated dog beds are also very expensive,” said Mrs P, “They can run up to hundreds of dollars in the local pet shops for medium to big dogs. The Ikea cushions cost us under $10, and even the cheapest baby cot mattress cost us $20. Of course, it’s the more sensible choice. The bed is easily replaceable when the dog gets sick and vomits all over the bed. Also, we now have a layer of mattress protector for the new bed. So fingers crossed, we may not even throw the bed away the next time if she vomits on the bed again. Choy! Choy! Choy!”

Despite the publicised dog protest on Mrs P’s dog blog, Mr P was keen to suggest that the unlicensed dog protest was a non-event.

“Give her big bed she still half on the ground,” he commented in a Whatsapp message from work, labeling the dog’s actions as “stupid” and a manifestation of her low intellectual capability to understand the proper usage of the bed. The couple has shared on their dog blog, what can only be described as a picture to publicly shame the dog while it was sleeping.

Picture: Donna the local mongrel shamed for bad sleeping habits, a subterfuge for the country’s first unlicensed dog protest activity?

The blog post itself sent conflicting messages with pictures that featured the dog sleeping in awkward postures in a gloomy cell-like environment but also dreamy pictures of the dog in peaceful slumber or otherwise seemingly not unhappy even on her old 65 x 65 cm bed.

Picture: Donna the local mongrel in dreamy slumber in what looks like a highly manipulated photographic image of the dog taken during its protest.

Donna the local mongrel is currently at risk of being investigated by local authorities for what is being publicised by this news report as the first unlicensed protest carried out by a dog locally.

In Singapore, unlicensed protests are restricted to be held at the Speakers’ Corner in Hong Lim Park only. The actual event still needs to be registered with the authorities beforehand. Un-named imaginary lawyers advised that if convicted, the dog’s owners Mr & Mrs P may be liable to send the dog to counseling in two areas – (1) positive dog training for proper sleeping habits and (2) counseling for the dog so the dog understands that it does not have citizen rights to protest, being a local mongrel with no Pink identification card.

When advised of the possible punishments, Mrs P said that she would not mind if the authorities send them for free positive dog training in any area and Mr P said that counseling for the dog may not help the dog to understand anything at the end of the day because she is already “stupid”.

Both said they are glad that the possible punishments did not include community service for the dog, such as clearing other dogs’  poop around the neighbourhood.

“It would be an absolute horror if she starts eating dog poop on top of all the leaves and flowers that made her vomit on her bed in the first place!” said Mrs P.

Postnote: This is a companion article to Bored Dog Gets New Chill Out Pad. I originally submitted for the photo challenge. But the writing challenge seems fun, so I decided to repost in newspaper article format again for Daily Prompt: Ripped Into The Headline. I must be too free. Hah! Time to take dog out to pee. Bye~